To My Fellow Mothers

If you’re a Mom this message is for you.  It has been circulated many times before in various ways, but it is worth repeating.

So here it is – In this moment, I’m asking you to take a step back and think about all the negative self-talk that goes through your head each day.  Consciously quiet the judgmental voice that tells you that you’re not doing enough, that other moms are doing more and that they’re doing it better than you are.  Resist the panic you feel when someone innocently mentions that their similarly aged child has mastered a skill that your child hasn’t quite yet got a handle on.

And here is why – These thoughts and feelings are counterproductive and self-defeating.  They rob you of the simple joys and well-deserved feelings of accomplishment that are your reward for each day that you nurture your children in the special way that only YOU can!

What makes a perfect mom isn’t the endless list of recreational activities, the organic homemade meals, an immaculately kept home or beautifully crafted handmade Halloween costumes – not that these aren’t all things to be admired.  A perfect mom is the result of the perfect love she has for her children each moment of every day.  (Notice I didn’t say the exhaustless, never frustrated, always unconditional love, because that is another unrealistic, self-defeating ideal that warrants challenge.)

And how do I know this?  Because my own hard-working, single mother never had the time to raise two girls and make Halloween costumes, let alone keep an immaculate home!  But she loved me so deeply that her perfect love was able to carry me through unspeakable challenges.  And yours will do the same for your children.

One last request – Be kind.  Have compassion not only for yourself as you navigate motherhood this day, but for your fellow mothers, as well.
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Dani Battiest, formerly Dani Westover, is a native San Diegan who practices law in Carmel Valley as an estate planning and business law attorney at Barger Law Group, APC. When she’s not working she enjoys family time with her husband and their two young daughters. Dani recently opened Kizzie’s Karousel, an online shop selling handmade tutus, totes and other fun accessories for girls.  It is her dream to travel to Italy where she can finally put her three semesters of college Italian to use.